when i was preparing to come to palestine, i sought out advice from friends and friends of friends who had been here before to get as precise of a picture as possible in terms of what i should anticipate when i'm questioned by the IDF at the border. they all unanimously told me that telling them that i was Muslim would be a bad idea. especially since my passport clearly says that I'm from Bangladesh. given the circumstances, i needed to have a story, and being Muslim, even having heard of a Palestine, being socially aware in any way, being nothing but an Israeli loving dumb American tourist couldn't be a part of it. I was even told to not bring a copy of the Quran, nor a prayer rug or any other symbolic item.
Naturally, I had to contemplate about this, a lot. Practicality versus morality. To say the least the mental tug of war was extremely difficult for me.
I made up my mind. I needed to get into Palestine. There couldn't be anything more pointless than telling IDF the truth, I'd get sent back to the US, back to square 1, and what good would that do? I wouldn't be able to do anything. I wanted to be in Palestine, I wanted to work here, I wanted to be socially active for something that I believed in, and I did not want to let it slip from my hands because of political bullshit. I prayed a lot, and I hope that at the end of the day God forgives me for the lies, and sees my intention inshAllah.
So it began. I was Christian, as were my parents, I was going to Israel, I didn't even know what the Palestinian territories were and I loved Israel. Did I mention that I love Israel? Because I really love Israel.
After 3 and a half hours of waiting, being interrogated, sitting around, being interrogated again, waiting, we got in. Thankfully, they didn't check my suitcase that did have my prayer rug and my copy of the Qur'an in it.
Working in a Catholic school, my company has been predominantly Christian, although there are many Muslim teachers and Muslim students. It's very hard to tell who's who though. The way that others found out that I actually wasn't Christian, was when they'd invite me over for dinner and wine, and I'd have to reply with "sure! I'd love to come over. but I don't drink wine". They'd look at me in surprise and ask "why not???" and I'd have to say with a chuckle "Because I'm Muslim." ... "oh!":: awkward transition:: "well we'll have Sprite instead!"
As wonderful as it's been to be embraced without any judgement (though I'm definitely considered Bangladeshi at school and not American because I'm brown, and Maggie is definitely the American teacher) for the past couple of months I've felt like an outsider in my community and stuck in a strange limbo of neither belonging here nor there. I'm so used to having a Muslim community around me that is receptive, and I'm so used to be able to go to the Mosque to pray that suddenly being stripped from that IN a Muslim country has caused mental discomfort and strife.
Earlier this year, before the Israeli govt took the Palestinian side of the Ibrahimi mosque, M and I had gone to Hebron to see it. At the checkpoint, we were let through under the pretext of both of us being Christian. When I went inside the mosque, a friendly looking man approached us offering to show us around, anticipating that I was Muslim, and when I told him that I wasn't (not wanting to change the story from what I told the guards), he basically treated us like shit the entire time we were there. It was jarring for him to treat us the way he did thinking that I was something that I was not, and it was jarring to think that his treatment would be so different had he known that I was really Muslim.
Are people really incapable of seeing each other as human beings?
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